Polluted James 1:27

My Father! I love when you speak to me… sometimes I feel like I am too polluted by this world to hear you clearly and that is the worst feeling to me! I am making life too complicated, not trusting in you enough and failing to keep myself, my heart pure for YOU! I desire that childlike faith, childlike simplicity in my life and in my relationship with you! You’re my good, good daddy who loves me! I can depend on you and KNOW that you will come through for me no matter what the circumstances look like or seem to say! we have to SIMPLY chose to look at life, the situation, the trauma, the problems, the day….etc. we chose to keep Gods perspective. We do not focus on our weakness or the evil that is always present, we focus on His face, Jesus eyes! Its that simple, yet we find it so hard to do! We have to be conquerors of our own thoughts and minds! (2 Cor. 10:5) Taking those thoughts captive and taking them, even dragging them sometimes, back to Jesus! This takes practice and I will be meditating on my God and His ways such as this so that He will help me! We can be confident in our God! He is sufficient, what Jesus has already done is more than enough for all of us! And we are sustained by His love!!! We have to learn to receive that love… to just rest in it and allow Him to pour it on us and fill us up! Without being filled up we cannot give it out to others… and that’s when all kinds of our issues arise! If we are filled up people, we can be in relationships with others (all kinds from friends and family to spouse…etc.) and not be constantly looking to them to fill our needs but enjoying loving each other and giving rather than taking…! This also I am learning and asking for His help on! I have so much to learn but am so excited to hear God speaking, to me, and through others to me! Through books and sermons…. Sometimes I wake up and just know I need more God, right then to make it through the day! I realize at that start of the day moment that I have been polluted by the world and want to be completely pure so I can hear my God and feel His love! I ask Him to purify me and to love on me! I just lay there and wait for His love! He wants us to be still and remember how He is God and no one else… how I need Him, and am desperate for Him! Like Heidi Baker says – we are desperate for God and hungry for Him like the poor are for food, water, clothes and shelter… its hard for us successful, rich (compared to the rest of the world) Americans to relate to that deep hunger and desperation! Our souls, our spirits and our hearts are living off so little, yet we are distracted by our “busy” lives and our possessions… our important relationships…etc. that we don’t even realize it! When in reality none of that even matters, all that we hold so high and let distract us, pollute us, or even let make us forget about God, is so meaningless. We care too much about the present world… when we have forever to come! Forever with our maker God! That is what matters! The Bible talks so much about storing up our treasure in Heaven instead of on earth! And how it really is easier to love God rightly, obey Him, and go to Heaven if you are poor… poor in spirit, knowing that we are desperate for Him and He is all we need! Here on earth, is so temporary, while we live for eternity in Heaven with our God, I want to focus more on that, which matters, which I happen to not be able to see, than on this temporary meaningless earthly life!

Crazy Love, Compelled by Love.... Gods love!!!

I’ve been preparing for my trip and to do so I’ve been reading some great books! Some of them are required for the Harvest School and some are not! I have extra reading time at work (apparently when school starts back nobody goes to the pool!), so I’ve read Crazy Love and Heidi Bakers book Compelled by Love. Both are such amazing books, they have changed my heart and will change my life! Crazy Love speaks strongly about how Christians are really supposed to live! How we have become complacent, lazy, selfish, half-hearted followers of God. It gives lots of great verses of what Jesus really meant when He asked people to follow Him and how we can change our lives in order to store up real treasures in Heaven, where it matters! And the book by Heidi Baker talks about how to learn from children and the poor, how to have innocent beautiful faith, and to hunger and thirst for God the way we should! We are all really desperate for God deep down, in America we have so much stuff and money and distractions that we don’t even realize how hungry we are and should be for God! They get it! And we need to learn fro them :). It teaches about what real love really is! Gods love for us and how He will fill us up to overflowing so we spill out on all others! So these books are really preparing my heart, soul, and spirit for loving and serving the poor, orphans, needy, and learning more and more about my God and His love! Both of them are amazingly filled with stories and Biblical truths about LOVE! I’ve also been looking into all I’ll need to bring (apparently I am going to be especially thankful for peanut butter and toilet paper!), and all the funds I am going to need! Plane tickets are ridiculously expensive when your flying halfway across the world… no doubt its partly due to all those nasty plane meals they constantly wake you up for ever 2 hours or so… anyways I (despite the 3 jobs I’ve worked this summer to save up!) am still short and trusting God to provide because I know He is soo faithful!!! If any of you asks the Lord and feels led to send me a lil help ;) ha ha you could send a check to –
1760 N. Bass Dr. Mt.Juliet TN, 37122
And if you ask the Lord how He wants you to support me and He says pray! Spiritual warfare is soo important! I know that I am going to need so much support spiritually, and also protection from the enemy who would love to steal all that God has for me! There are a lot of sicknesses there that are common and I would love your prayers for health and healing! Ha ha there is so much! But God is so much bigger than all else that I already know He has it taken care of! I know your prayers will help fight those spiritual battles that will most definitely be taking place! I pray for all of you, for peace, rest, deep love, that Gods face will shine on you, that He will be gracious to you, that He will bless you and keep you, and pour His spirit into your heart constantly :) I love you all!

Confirmation

So when I first heard about the Harvest School of missions in Mozambique I knew it would be an amazing thing to be a part of! Since then I have for one reason or another tried to write it off as not a possibility. I tried to look into other options but the Lord kept drawing me back to Mozambique… And not because it is on the beach… ha ha, its actually going to be there summer time when I am there so its going to upward of 100 degrees during the day and about 90 or more at night… with absolutely no AC at any time! Haha I am a little nervous about sleeping in the heat, seeing as when I was in Haiti we had to sleep with no AC and it was nearly impossible! If you roll to where any part of your body, like one leg touching the other, is touching any other part of your body, you sweat profusely ☺ haha, I am hopeful that the electricity will allow me to use a fan at night, but there is no guarantee of this! So it was definitely the Lord who keps brining my attention back to this school! A few of the reasons I was trying to find other options were ones like, that my closest friend when I was little is getting married, like 10 days after I leave for Africa! And my brother and his wife are having an amazing baby boy (Daniel Steven Thomas!) about 2 weeks after I leave! So I figured that because God values family and friends maybe I should stay! But then I read some verses and read some chapters in Crazy Love, that expressed to me that the most important thing to God is serving Him and His suffering people, and that it requires sacrifice on our part to obey! That we must think of the life to come more than the one were in, and storing treasures in heaven by doing Gods will, and being passionate about the things that His heart is passionate about is so much more important than anything here on this temporary earth! Then one night at Emanate (the young adult group at Grace Center church in Franklin) the teacher talked about the Hedi Baker school that I had been thinking about a lot! And about all the miracles, the healings, the people being saves and the lives being transformed! I knew I had to look more into it! Just hearing about those things got me so excited and I asked the Lord how I could be involved in His great works! And I heard “GO”…. To Mozambique…. Wow! I wanted to go so badly! Then soon after I had a dream that I told my friend I couldn’t be here for her wedding because of the school, and she said it was really okay, and even helped even out the wedding party because she had more brides maids than her man had groomsmen! But when I woke up and talked to my Mom about it I was quickly reminded how she reacted when I asked the date of her wedding earlier in the summer, and she had responded with something like… “Hannah Bates! You have to be in my wedding! You cant run off to Africa and save babies while Im getting married!” hahaha… kinda discouraging for me thinking about telling her… mean while I apply for the school and get accepted! I’ve been working 3 jobs all summer to save up for whatever God had for me next (unfortunately some of this $ had unexpected destinations due to surprises like needing my wisdom teeth removed!). Apparently I wasn’t trusting my God enough to believe in how He gives us dreams for a reason and speaks through them often! I was nervous about telling my friend because I didn’t want to disappoint her! I kept facebooking her, texting her and such saying we should get to gether soon, and I was planning on telling her then… well we are both very busy girls and it didn’t workout for about a month! Finally God got my attention in a dream that basically said if I didn’t get on stuff (telling my friend, confirming with the school… getting my flight scheduled!) then I was going to miss all that He has for me this fall at the school! So realizing this I started calling my friend, and getting things together for my trip! I also asked Him if I was ready for this spiritually, and how I want to know and utilize my spiritual gifts more for His kingdom! He clearly told me that in Mozambique I will learn more about and how to use my spiritual gifts, another tid bit – my Mom has always felt the Lord telling her that prophesy was something God is going to use me for! Sooo…. Next I leave my friend a message telling her to call me soon! The next day I call her again….etc. I’m finally getting ready to leave her a voice mail saying something like, hey I’m going to Africa instead of being in your wedding! Okay bye! Hahaha to my Moms extreme disapproval… I didn’t do that yet ☺. Later that night while I was just getting to sleep… my phone rings! I roll over and see her name… I think…. Well should I answer it?! Im not really in the best of sorts for this kind of conversation! Plus I didn’t have the note I had written to help me say the right things instead of whatever absurd things came to mind! Hahaha, but I felt the Lords peace, and Him saying just answer and I’ll help you… so I did! She led me right into it by saying that she had been soo busy, doing things that she had wanted to do, and that at our age it’s the best time to do these things in our hearts! Haha I was like well yeah! And started telling her about the school… then I told her when it was! Silence for a second… scared Hannah… then overwhelming support from her! Excited for me and telling me that she felt its what God had for me and that she knew I would go back to Africa sometime! Then (the kicker) she says that she was already 2 up on her hubby to be in brides maids so it evens things out! Wow God! Just like you said in my dream…. Huh, turns out God knows what He’s talking about and I should trust Him! hahaha… as many times as He has taught me this, I still need reminding! Then at church a couple days later a friend comes up to ask about my trip to Africa… and says that she really thinks God is going to use my time there to bring out more prphicy in me! Wow! Confirmation couldn’t be stronger ☺. Also the Lord has spoken to me about some healing I need, and made me feel like I would receive more of that in Mozambique, then a friend of mine who has met Heidi Baker tells me that the love of God is so strong in her that when your around her the perfecting, HEALING love of God just exudes and healing simply happens! Wow…. Neadless to say I am very excited about this trip that God has planned for me! And how He has confirmed His will that I go and be changed!

Mozambique!!!!

I have been accepted to Heidi Bakers Harvest school of missions in Mozambique Africa! And I am thrilled! This will be such an awesome learning experience... preperation for my future, and streatching of me spiritually! I will be taking classes and learning a whole lot, as well as involved in helping with the orphanage and school Iris Ministries has there! I will be leaving on October 17th hopefully and return around December 21st! I could really use all the prayers of my friends and family that I earn/raise enough money to go! And to come back! haha the plane tickets will be expensive! The actual cost of teh school is only about 2,500 and that covers my food, place to live/sleep, and all the classes for 3 months! But the air fare is going to be about 1,500! So please join me in prayer askin gfor the Lords help to raise all of this money! Also please pray with me for preperation spiritually! That my faith would grow bigger and stronger as I get ready to go and do as He has called me to! I am so excited to go and serve those people! To do exactly what the Bible tells me to do which I have out lined in verses in a lot of my previous blogs! I have reciently through talking about the Lord and the passions he has given, with Joshua, discovered a little bit of why I love it so much.... I love when the Lord relveals to you things about yourself you didnt realize before! And when He uses ithers in your life to do that! Ahhhh its just amazing! So we were talking about the secret things of God the Bible talks about... the things we have to search and seek out about Him and His kingdome, and even ourselves, that He only shows us when we really look deeper into Him! And I was saying how I believe that the desire to serve others and help those who need it so desperately is such a huge part of Gods heart and how He repeatedly tells us to do this in His word! So I think that when people have that desire, it means they are seeking God and He has shown Him a part of His heart for the poor, orphans, and all those people in such distress! Then we talked about how some people might do it just for the good feeling, or the look of it, or because their family does... instead of the true deep calling and drive from their relationship with the Lord our God! And then we discussed how we all have different callings, different strengths and weaknesses.... different paterns/tendancies of our flesh, I know that one of my fleshly tendancies/weaknesses is selfishness... I know that a lot of people struggle with this also, but I have known this about myself and been fighting it and asking the Lord to change my heart there! Then it hit me! - (God spoke!) saying that, that is the reason! Thats part of why I love so much and am so satisfied when I serve others and treat them as more important than myself... help them! Because it is exactly the opposite of my flesh! My sinful nature says "its all about me" so when I go directly against that and serve others as better than me and love them as I do myself it is sooo right.... its what God is telling me to do, to oppose my sinful selfishness....! :) so that made me really happy and still is! Because thats exactly what I want to always be doing - fighting my sinful, fleshly nature - to serve my God better and glorify the beautiful name of - JESUS!

Beautiful...

Life is simply beautiful even when its hard - you know its a season of fighting the enemy... because you KNOW Gods in control - no matter what happens... its part of living... and the hard times produce good... If your heart is in a higher place with God you trust, have peace, rest, and even joy... circumstances dont overcome you because God says your an overcomer! And when you believe Him - feel His divine love - you cant help but have faith that moves mountains - and the hard times arent so bad... God speaks to us through our dreams in the night and not always are they good... but somehow always beautiful because He said it! And He is in control.... it comes down to faith. And taking that posture of receiving His love... letting Him pour it out over us... soo good, were soo in love we say "okay God"... "Change whatever you want... take it, move it..." he wont relent until He has it all..... give Him your heart! Fresh springs of new growth! Renewal Holy Spirit!

Loved by the King!!! AMAZING

Security, peace, confidence, and rest… in who you are, not worrying about what others think… but not so much in who you are, but in KNOWING that you’re His! Such a better feeling/way to live life! FREE! I at times will get caught up in life ☺ and sometimes it gets hard, frustrating, because there is a very real devil fighting HARD against you and the ones you love! I hate him so much! I get “righteously angry” at the things he does to both me and those around me, it hurts me to see the deception, the believed lies… and no matter how much I get caught up, busy, start to worry… He pulls me back into His arms, so lovingly, and I go oh yeah…. This is all that really matters… this is what’s real, and naught else matters… such relief! Living simply, resting in Him, not worrying, these are things I fight for, and need to get better at! I tend to take things in my hands and worry about them because they seem “impossible” or too hard… in Romans 4 it talks about Abraham, how it was credited to him as RIGHTEOUSNESS just because he believed God, took Him at His word and trusted He would do as He promised! I long for this kind of faith! To simply believe God! KNOW that nothing it impossible or too hard for Him! Those verses – “Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations… Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead… Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised. This is why “it was credited to him as righteousness.” The words “it was credited to him” were written not for him alone, but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness – for us who believe in him who raised Jesus from the dead. He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.” Romans 4:18 – 25

I am loved by the King!!! I want to know His love more, His Holy Spirit more and more, more God! Release the fullness!


In Joshua chapters 2 and 6 Rahab the prostitute is spoken of… in chapter 2 she helps the Israelite spies hide because she knows that God had given them the land, she talked about how she knew that their God is the only true God, who created heaven and earth… wow, and she and her family are the only ones spared from Jericho. It continually calls her Rahab the prostitute, and it says that she lives among the Israelites forever after that. Goes to show, that we cannot judge, by outward appearances, or occupation, or anything else we think that we can! God is the only real judge of the heart and we cannot know. The more we try to be God, and judge others the more we are going to be judged. She knew God, she did what was right, and she prospered for it. Who can we be to say that God won’t use someone who was a prostitute?! He wants to use all people, He loves them all as His children, and He knows each of our deepest hearts… being a prostitute wasn’t His best for her, but He still loved her, her heart was still tender to Him, and He saved her! How beautiful that is!

“He did this (dried up the river for the Israelites to cross) so that all the peoples of the earth might know that the hand of the LORD is powerful and so that you might always fear the LORD your God.” Joshua 4:24

I am seeking the fear of my God… to fear Him rightly…

Life is hard. We have a very present flesh, world, and devil attacking us in our every moment. We have to constantly be fighting, but in HIS strength we can do it. We can live on earth, but FOR Him! It is not easy, but He gives us soooo much joy and peace, fills us with His Holy Spirit and His amazing love when we seek His strength to live this hard life His way!

Just a few thoughts, questions :)

What if we were all who He calls us to be? What if we weren’t afraid? What if we weren’t selfish? What if we really trusted God? What if we were patient? What if we listened for Gods voice and obeyed?
What if we let our personalities be brought to the fullest to be used by God?! The ways that we are different, all be used and made beautiful!!! If we gave up our will and truly wanted His, what would he have us doing?! What amazing, beautiful people would there be, with all our different gifts, personalities, and differences… how would He use us if we let Him? what amazing adventures would we be on?! What difficult situations, and hurtful life problems would we have avoided? Who would we be….? I imagine all the amazing people I know, and then wonder if were doing exactly what He created us to do. Or if somewhere along the way we have gotten distracted, busy, in our own plans, our own will instead of really seeking His! What amazing things we would be doing! How we would be helping others! Saving the lost, comforting the hurting, parenting the orphans, working for His kingdom, storing our treasures in heaven where they do not spoil, harvesting in that ripe field God so desperately longs for harvesters, giving to the poor, and loving the “un-lovable”. Who has God created you to be? What gifts had He given you? What are the skills and life experiences He’s given you and would want you to be using for His glory?!